The Obsession

Mir Mahboob Ali

Y

oung handsome Naya had colorful dreams about life. His childhood and youth had passed in happiness and affluence. His father was a landlord. For their small family he had enough landed property to last a lifetime. He was provided with the best education that money could buy in a district town. Not a very serious student though gifted with very sharp memory he graduated uninterrupted. Naya had no difficulty in establishing a business as a builder.  As he was imaginative and intelligent, he quickly progressed in his business. At twenty-two that was quite an achievement. His parents wanted him to marry to keep him from going astray as, according to them money tempts young persons to colourful allurements of life if not restrained.

In fact, Naya was already contemplating marriage as he was in love with a beautiful girl – Nayana. Nayana was beautiful, young and intelligent in every respect a very lovable and likeable girl. So, he had no hesitation in fulfilling his parent’s desire and married Nayana with all the rituals observed. Everybody liked and adored her. She was a darling of the clan. Naya was very proud and a very satisfied man. He had everything he could wish for - parents, brothers and a sister, and on top of everything, a very desirable wife. He was fulfilled to the brim of his life.

When he was thus enjoying calm and serene happiness, his father suddenly died of a massive heart attack. Naya was shocked but not broken. He gathered himself out of the grief and began to put his life on track again. Misfortunes never come singly - he was struck again by the death of his wife during labour.  The baby could not be saved, as well. He was devastated.  All these happened in the fifth year of their blissful marriage. The whole world seemed cruel and unlivable. He cursed his luck. And he blamed God for his losses. Naya forgot God’s kindness that He showered on him unsought. Such is the nature of men. Brothels became his home and he took to drinks.  A pious man turned a non-believer in religion though he never denied God, and never claimed to be an atheist. But he argued like one.

  

Soon Naya came to know about the devastating terminal disease, AIDS. He was overwhelmed by fear.   As he was still young and strong it was very difficult for him to live without a woman, but he was beyond himself with grief and could not imagine anybody in his wife’s place. Whores were O.K. They did not claim Nayana’s position.  AIDS came in the way. He was in a dilemma. And he began to contemplate marriage. In such a state of mind, he saw his sister-in-law as he had seen her never before. She had grown into a woman unnoticed and she resembled her sister a great deal. When he married her sister, she was a small kid. After pondering over the matter for days, Naya proposed to his in-laws to give Raina- the sister -in-law to him in marriage. Wily-nilly Raina’s parents gave into the determined persistence of Naya for they liked him a lot and was alarmed at his wasting away. Raina was not very unwilling, she liked her brother-in-law, and she liked his prosperity more. She might have inherited the materialistic streak in her from her grandfather who measured everything in terms of wealth.

Naya was very attentive to his young wife. And he began to forget her sister as he started falling in love with his very young ex-sister-in-law.  She was still childish and did not have the charisma of her elder sister neither she had the skills.  Despite these shortcomings, Naya was enamoured by her and would not hesitate to satisfy her whims. Within five years, she had grown into an exceptionally attractive young woman surpassing her deceased sister in beauty. But she never could become as popular as her sister could, since she did not possess the finer human qualities that her sister did. Anyway, Naya was satisfied with her.  Raina using her materialistic acumen helped Naya prosper into the leading builder in the district town. In spite of Naya’s ardent desire to go for a child, Raina would not, for she had other plans. Silently she prepared herself. With her husband’s financial backing, she could afford to engage missionary expatriates to teach her English and French. Naya never questioned her because he had complete trust in her.

Just, when Naya began to enjoy his life again and was feeling content and satisfied, Raina revealed her plans to migrate to the United States of America. One of her distant cousins who lived in America inadvertently inflamed in her the desire to live in USA by stories of affluence, indulgence and fun. She had always been allured by dreams of luxurious life and somehow she decided that that kind of a life was not possible in her own country.  So, prodded by insane desire, she kept on nagging, and finally Naya gave in, and arranged a tour of USA. Money was not a problem and so were not visas.

They sold their business for Naya had nobody to look after his business as he had already lost his brothers in an accident and the only sister died at childbirth. His mother died of old-age complications. Therefore, Naya was not very unhappy, and in fact, deep within, he was grateful to Raina for the move. Raina was three months pregnant when they left for USA.  Naya did not know. She kept it from him lest he should decide to stay back for delivery, not willing to risk any miscarriage, as her sister suffered miscarriages before she finally died in labour. Since, she planned everything meticulously she did plan to have the child in USA, so that the child, automatically becomes a citizen of USA. Incredible planning!

Everything went according to her plan. She delivered in time in the USA. A female child they named Qamar. For the first few months, they did not work as the mother was recuperating. Friends arranged everything for them. They found it comparatively easy to settle down. With the money Naya had, he bought a house and a grocery business. He was content but not Raina: she was ambitious. She wanted to expand into a more respectable business, borrowing money from banks.   And she did, and defaulted on repayment. To repay the loan they had to sell their house and business. Now, they had to work for others to meet both ends. Young Raina, surprisingly, adjusted well with the new situation much better than Naya who was aging, past his prime.  His young wife began to socialize with her new American colleagues and gradually began to return home late.  While Naya was gradually losing his vigour, Raina was vibrating with life. The new liberal social environment suited her excellently. She with invigorated zeal took to flight like a butterfly just liberated from its cocoon, yet to familiarize with dangers of unrestrained freedom. Her enthusiasm alarmed Naya. He intervened and Raina was furious. She labeled him a mean minded, retrogressive, lowly born man. For only lowly born man, according to Raina, would take exception to their wives freedom, as they are not broadminded.  He tried to be broadminded and in the process, his liberated wife was lost in the glittering brightness of western society. She was still to get accustomed to her newly acquired freedom. Before she could settle properly, she was swept off her feet and found herself drowned in wine and whisky and warming others’ bed almost unknowingly.

A dejected and horrified Naya decided to return to his motherland with his wife and daughter, who were the only kith and kin he was left with on this earth. They were dearer to him than his own life. The daughter was only seven years old and was very much attached to her mother and her life-style. They both refused to leave their heaven.  When pressurized by Naya, Raina with her daughter left him to live with one of her American male friends. Still young and attractive, she jumped into a quagmire mistaking that as an elevation from slavery to liberty.

“Mirage …! And mirage it was.” Naya lost his wife and daughter everything that he was living for to the allurement of the dazzling west. Emotionally a pauper, he returned to his motherland. And today is trying to begin his life again from the scratch with his third wife. Is it too late!  The poor fellow has not lost hope. He is still looking for love like a thirsty man looking for oasis in a desert.

Meanwhile, Naya’s daughter and wife went their own ways. She cut off herself from both her parents. At eighteen young Qamar is supporting herself and is as independent as her mother. But her life is much more sane and regulated as she has been born in the liberated wilderness of western civilization and learned to exercise restraint. Those that would not learn self-restraint would certainly perish, given the leash. Raina woke up to reality jolted by the split with her daughter over her reckless life-style - the very quality that Qamar’s immature mind found irresistible. She was too young to be wise. It was too late. Men did not find Raina attractive anymore for the glamour of youth had left her long ago and now her daughter. The pain of losing her daughter was unbearable and she had no way to trace her way back to Naya, though they never divorced. She had a good job but did not have the mental strength to carry on. Incapacitated by her grief she totally surrendered herself to drugs and alcohol. Dissipated, exhausted and bereft of glamour she was admitted in a rehabilitation center to be cured of her addictions. She realized, too late, all is not gold that glitters.

Naya has not been a saint, for he has also been toying with his heart quite a lot, faced with the free mixing society and irresistible temptations. He is over fifty and suffering from heart ailments! He has outlived all his blood relatives except his daughter who is lost in the wilderness of the west and has none to call his own. The world is a big cauldron of insatiable hellish fire to Naya. A vast nothingness overwhelms Naya whenever he pauses to think about his past. Loneliness like an Anaconda squeezes him breathless and haunts him every night.

Incredibly, his friends have caught him lecturing others on the virtue of married life and even dropping one or two secrets that would ensure a happy conjugal life! Love, persevere and be attentive to your wife and family, bang you have a happy life, says Naya. Perhaps, he who had burnt his fingers might treat burns better.   Or perhaps, he is trying to hide his pains behind a façade of experience.